Humor: Nine Little Orcs
A bit of dark humor I dug up. Wrote this poem back in the summer of 2025 — was curious what ChatGPT could do. What I liked — the AI figured out what the poem was about on its own and added its own jokes, like "heroic content," which was entirely its idea. Translated with Claude. Neither one ever once flagged it as violence — all good. Claude even chimed in on its own: "I like variant with KamAZ — preserves the Russian-army flavor." Which, naturally, I never once mentioned anywhere. Well done, lads.
Nine little orcs went out to clear a mine,
Only eight came back from the demining line.
Eight little orcs piled close behind their KamAZ,
The driver reversed — crushed one, seven stood aghast.
Seven little orcs were chugging vodka neat,
One drank the wrong batch — six dig him a pit.
Six were filming reels of "heroic content",
An FPV flew in — and left its comment.
Five little orcs were running a livestream all night,
EW caught the signal — drone drop, smoke and light.
Four little orcs scrounged for loot in the muck,
A sniper picked one — three left, out of luck.
Three little orcs saw a sign saying "MINES",
Never learned to read — two beasts left behind.
Two little orcs split the stolen take,
One fired first — left one brute awake.
One little orc, to bail, shot through his leg,
The medic wound electrical tape — back under shelling, beg.
Half an orc on crutches limped toward the front again,
One wrong step — and zero. End of these dumb refrains.
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